‘Why did you buy that for?’ A seemingly innocent enough question, but once you look behind the surface an entire world of control and coercion emerges. Financial abuse is tactic by which abusers seek to gain control over a relationship by controlling a partners finances in order to regulate their behaviour and prevent them from leaving. In an article released by the National Network to End Domestic Violence it has been articulated that financial abuse occurs in 98% of abusive relationships and surveys of domestic abuse survivors indicate that the fear of an inability to provide for themselves and their families was one of the top reasons for staying in an abusive relationship (link). All over the country millions of women are being financially abused, yet it remains one of the least recognised and understood forms of abuse.
So how do you know if you’re being financially abused?
- Does your partner prevent you from working or control your salary?
- Do you have no decision about how money is spent in your relationship?
- Does your partner withhold money from you or only allow you an ‘allowance’?
- Does your partner prevent you from seeing or being included on financial statements?
- Does your partner threaten you or make you feel guilty when you want to make purchases?
- Does your partner hide assets from you or not inform you of major financial decisions like taking a loan?
- Do you feel like your powerless, like you’re dependant on your partner for food, clothing and shelter?
- Does your partner force you to do things you don’t want to do in return for access to money?
Financial abuse has very real consequences and may result in feelings of helplessness, a complete loss of autonomy and leave you feeling forced to stay in a situation you know is bad for you. It also has significant monetary implications and victims of financial abuse are often left in situations where they have no means to support themselves and this may result in bad credit scores, an inability to seek loans, loss of employment opportunities and homelessness. If these signs signal a red flag in your relationship, it may be time for you to recognise that this is not okay and you can find the help you need to escape this vicious cycle of abuse.
If you are in a similar situation or wish to know more about financial abuse, please do not hesitate to contact our offices on 02 8917 8700.